2-25-06

I can’t recall when my memory started slipping.I guess that makes sense, huh?

It has been in the last few years, but I don’t remember when, exactly. My internal hard drive must apparently be running at full capacity, something some people might question.

I need to access my internal memory and either upgrade or erase some of the stuff that isn’t necessary, like the bad memories. It’s almost like I have a virus in my system slowing things down.

Yeah, this is part of getting older, but I don’t like it. My wife gets rather frustrated at me. I forget stuff she tells me all the time, but I try to rank things by importance.

I have my memories divided into three different segments.

The first is really important stuff. The recall ratio in this area is approximately 70/30.

Next up is the semi-important stuff. The recall ratio here is approximately 50/50. Not great odds, but not bad.

The final is the stuff I have been told or heard and don’t really give a flip about. We’re talking bad ratios here. I can’t remember if I have actually bet on the ratio, but it has to be around 10-90.

I do have selective memory. I can recall the score of the Oklahoma-Florida State national championship game (13-2 in favor of the Sooners) but can’t remember much of the stuff people tell me.

Part of that is I have to talk to so many people every day. My listening cup gets so full and eventually flows over, to be dispersed straight into the toilet.

I also tend to remember stuff better on the weekend. I remember reading something about this, but not what it said.

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I do recall making a terrible mistake last night. We were over at my mother-in-law’s house.

The wife wanted to take Rufus so he could play with the mother-in-law’s new fluffy dog. After the fluffy female dog stopped trying to hump Rufus, I do recall thinking this is strange, Rufus and whatever the other dog is named (they told me…I forgot) got to playing.

Well, I was enjoying watching the dogs play and made the mistake of saying, “Rufus needs another puppy to play with at home!”

Crapfire, man! What were you thinking. I thought this immediately after saying it, at least I think that was what I thought. You could almost see the old light bulb go off in the wife’s head.

Another puppy! What fun. I hoped her memory would not recall that little slip. She did, of course. By the time we got home, she had the newspaper out and was looking in the classifieds, calling to see about puppies.

Argh! I can’t handle multiple Rufus dogs at the moment. He has decided that I should take him out several times a night to make his deposit. I might be wrong, but I think the old wife might be awake during those moments, but she is playing possum.

Hopefully she will not remember this. I do.